Fairly recently, as of the writing of this, I wrote a blog about Christianity and pornography. My focus in it was mostly on the process of making pornographic films, and if it was demeaning to women. There was a Progressive Christian Facebook page that posted it, and there was a lot of discussion.
Something that was a major eye opening experience for me was looking at the people who had clicked 'like' on it from that Facebook page. When looking to see the names and profile pictures of the people who clicked 'like,' I was expecting a bunch of teenage and college boys to be the ones to express gratitude. However, to my surprise, most of the gratitude seemed to be from strong and empowered women.
Something that ended up getting more likes than my blog was a comment one of these women made about why she thinks pornography is so heavily looked down upon. She commented that the real issue people have is that sexuality is so heavily looked down upon. Our bodies are considered shameful, sexuality and lust are considered sinful, and they are forced to be repressed. Admittedly, I think this very intelligent woman was onto something.
Many other comments seemed to be on the negative effects that it has on marriages. The story typically seems to be a husband is caught watching porn behind his wife's back, and they end up getting divorced. I wonder if the problem is the watching of pornography or the fact that he was lying and doing something behind his wife's back. If it is equal to cheating, isn't the husband the problem? Blaming pornography is like blaming the woman that the man cheated with. She possibly had no idea that he was married, situation depending.
One issue people seemed to express was about the effects it has on men and the lustful desires it gives them. In all honesty, I find that viewpoint comparable with the viewpoint that women should cover up because it will add feelings of lust onto men. People are responsible for their own desires and actions. Blaming pornography for the actions of men who watch it is freeing them of their responsibilities. If a man has desires to rape, cheat, molest, or doing anything in that nature, he is responsible for that. Add to that, if porn has any part in this story, it is that he watched a film because he already had those desires in the first place.
Another issue people seemed to have was that these films are demeaning towards women in how women are depicted in the films. I think that the problem here is not that pornography does so, but that our society does so. Our society doesn't objectify women because of pornography. Pornography objectifies women because of our society.
The last criticism that I will include here is what Jesus would say. He does say that when a man looks upon a woman with lust, he is committing adultery in his heart already. Again, that's his own responsibility, and not the responsibility of pornography. Without porn, people might watch a public speech, where they are sexually attracted to the speaker. They could watch a scene in a Hollywood movie and have lustful desires. Who am I kidding? They could look at the Venus de Milo statue or Michaelangelo's David. Without porn, people are already committing acts of lust. Most relationships probably start when two people are sexually attracted to each other, or in other words, have lustful desires. When I first wrote this blog, I wondered if Jesus is talking about it in the situation of if one is already married or not, or if he is speaking specifically in the terms of having lustful desires without any thought, consideration, or respect for that woman as a human being. Something about sexual activity is consent, and in the case of someone who has fully consented to be looked upon with sexual desire may not be what Jesus was thinking of. He lived in a time where, except for prostitutes, there weren't places where people could give an open permission to be lusted after in a consensual way. Something to note, however, is that it is only during times of watching their films when they have given their consent.
Some interesting things I saw on the other side of the argument was a story from a woman, talking about how she and her husband enjoy watching pornography together. She was saying it in response to someone who was objecting to pornography, and saying that we should learn to understand intimacy better. She said that for herself and her husband, watching porn adds intimacy into their sexual relationship. I really have nothing to say for or against her argument. All I can really say about herself and her husband is good for them. It's their life, and I'm unsure if I should even be talking about what they do together. As I don't have a name or a face included, and the story isn't too detailed, I think I can safely include this story.
In conclusion, I don't think porn is the cause of peoples' problems. I think porn exists more because of peoples' problems. Concerning the effects it has on couples, I think the causes there are with the couples, not films being watched. I'm not saying if people should watch porn or not, that's their own business. My view is we shouldn't be judgmental unless something is causing harm. Here, I've expressed that the harm seems to be from other places.
[EDIT: With further thought, I still see nothing wrong with the activity of pornography. However, there are several mainstream porn films that may have a negative effect on how people are viewing and understanding sexuality. Yes, these films are meant to be fantasies as movies typically are. However, these are fantasies that encourage negative behavior. What makes it even worse is that, due to our lack of sex education, pornography is the main way that young teenagers are being educated on sex.]
Shalom!
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